Reading List – On Love, Sex, and Sexuality

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When Does a Watershed Become a Sex Panic?

If the presumption of innocence is rooted in the idea that it is better to let ten guilty people go free than risk jailing one innocent person, then the policing of sex seems to assume that it’s better to have ten times less sex than to risk having a nonconsensual sexual experience. The problem is not just that this reduces the amount of sex people are likely to be having; it also serves to blur the boundaries between rape, nonviolent sexual coercion, and bad, fumbling, drunken sex. The effect is both to criminalize bad sex and trivialize rape.

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Discussing Consent in Gay Spaces Requires Nuance, Not Sex Panic

To suggest that the initial placement of a hand is in itself assault, however, completely betrays this contract and willfully ignores that consent can work differently in different contexts

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The Bodies of Others Are Not Mine

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Cruising in the Age of Consent

For women, sex remained “a bargaining tool”—something too socially significant to be casual, and something that could be taken, possibly by violence. At The Club, by contrast, everybody really was after the same thing: sex for the sake of sex. Brute coercion didn’t appear to be an issue. She walked away wishing that she had her own bathhouse to go to—that such free pleasure might be possible for women, too. And yet something still nagged at her. “Is this fuck palace the ultimate conclusion of sexist logic,” she wondered, “or is it erotic freedom?”

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Timeless Queer Defiance and it’s consequences in Nigeria With Chude

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But the outcome is a world in which young people are both liberated and miserable.

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Consenting to sex could require a text

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The Patriarchy Strikes Back

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Which means a vast expanse of bad sex — joyless, exploitative encounters that reflect a persistently sexist culture and can be hard to acknowledge without sounding prudish — has gone largely uninterrogated, leaving some young women wondering why they feel so fucked by fucking.

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Aziz, We Tried to Warn You

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Aziz Ansari Is Guilty. Of Not Being a Mind Reader.

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The Reinvention of Consent

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#MeToo Is Changing the Definition of ‘Bad Sex’

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Op-Ed: The Aziz Ansari story proves that our traditional ideas about consent are flawed

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But what may well emerge is a recognition that the clearest practices of “yes” and “no” do little to untangle a deep difficulty that makes consent seem promising yet wide of the mark: the altogether human experience of not knowing in the first place what is wanted or unwanted, desired or undesired.

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But consent has a limited purview, and it is being asked to bear too great a burden, to address problems it is not equipped to resolve.

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Even in the absence of a university policy, they are worried about inadvertently doing something in bed that their partner doesn’t welcome. And most men are actively thinking about whether their partner is enjoying herself.

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“At the end of my political career, I was as integrated on a policy level as I’d become on a personal level. It was my proudest moment.”

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Find love in a way that keeps you you

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There is no ‘gay gene.’ There is no ‘straight gene.’ Sexuality is just complex, study confirms

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The study by Andrea Ganna, lead author and European Molecular Biology Laboratory group leader at the Institute of Molecular Medicine in Finland, said the research reinforces the understanding that same-sex sexual behavior is simply “a natural part of our diversity as a species

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A gay utopia may be possible, but it is a project for the future, not a lost relic of the past.

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Goodluck Jonathan, this is your legacy.

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How to get the sex you want

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Wisdom about Jesus and sexuality

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The Most Important Thing In A Relationship

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Normal couples have problems with low desire and sexual boredom because it’s built into committed relationships.

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The mystery of billionaires’ long marriages

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The Indian Supreme Court hit all the right notes

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15 Heartening Ways Indian Brands And Bollywood Stars Are Fighting For LGBT Rights

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Why are we afraid of love in public spaces?

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Thank you India

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A hero like no other

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The current state of homosexuality research

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But it is not real love. It is only nature’s way of bringing two people together. It is supposed to happen and supposed to come to an end.

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Ask not only what is best for you, but also what is best for the relationship

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87% of gay men display levels of promiscuity that are parallel to those of unmarried straight men.

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“the psychological trauma of growing up and still living in a world that is run predominantly by heterosexual men is still a deeply painful world to live in.”

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The biological origins of the gay promiscuity stereotype and this opposition

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What discrimination does

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We should be clumsy enough to be ourselves wherever we are

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Our ideas of what is ‘natural’ are too often deeply dangerous

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Homosexuality as Population Control? Why Gays & Lesbians Are Essential to the Balance of Nature.

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Best of mates: why ‘gay genes’ are a good fit for Darwin

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From the perspective of one’s humanity, it may be a privilege to be queer

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The conservatives’ definition of a war on their rights is that gay people are allowed to get married and Latinx people are allowed to live in the same zip code

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What they’re actually reacting to is the message deep at the heart of the March for Our Lives, of Black Lives Matter, of the Women’s March: The world is bigger than you, and it belongs to us too.

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Free speech, still on the matter

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Every man has to read this about what women have suffered

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Who really has the power here?

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Call Me by Your Name allows PC persecutors to enjoy the double standard of idealizing adolescent sexual impulse and ignoring it when convenient

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This is really a pushback against a moral mob

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A beautiful, love story. About marriage, difference, boxes, and just being.

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